Monday, July 8, 2013

Expectations....

I had the pleasure of riding with a friend of mine, Allene to a Dena Kirkpatrick clinic a couple of weeks ago. It was so refreshing talking to her about anything and everything, however there is one thing that really is sticking my heart right now.  I might not have it exactly right, but she said something like this, "Expectations will break your heart."  I can relate to that so much right now and I know there are others out there that can feel it too.

After having my son Colter in March, I had it in my head that I was just going to bounce back, jump on Elvis and away we go on our way to the top.  I knew that I could do it and I knew that Elvis could do it, so why would it take much time to get back there?  What I didn't realize is just how HARD it is to getting there, physically AND mentally.  I completely expected to be back where we left off last fall in no time.

Because of my expectations, I was really heart broken when I realized just how little balance and strength I had and how hard it is to loose that extra weight to be back in my game.  Not to mention, riding a relatively young horse (6) that still is not solid and needs help; help that because of my lack of feel, timing, and balance I am not able to give him fully. To add a cherry on the top, try to get everything back riding one of the most powerful horses you've rode to date.  I'm not trying to make excuses, just stating facts. It's not as easy as I thought it'd be!

It's time to get to reality and realize that it IS going to take time, more practice, more dedication, sweat, and tears than I had originally expected.  For those of you that know me personally, you know that I've been pretty down and hard on myself.  Thank you to those of you that stepped up and said, "Hey, you're doing just fine...it'll come back!"  Thank you to those that lifted me up, when I felt so far down. And lastly, thank you to those that believe in me and Elvis and keep encouraging us on.  We will get there.  It might not be next week, or next month even, but we WILL get back to where we need to be.